It's a Gas, It's a Hit, It's a Crime

Since I won’t be splitting bills two ways any more, I’ll soon be broke. To see how broke, exactly, I Googled up some statistics. According to Canadian Council on Social Development, the poverty line for a “single-person family” (is than an oxymoron?) living in a city with a population of 350 000 is an annual income of $17 895. I make, oh, a bit more than half of that in actual income. So I’m not only considered poor, I’m below poor. Those poor people you see wearing clothing from the 80s, pushing around shopping carts full of junk, and picking cigarette butts out of the gutter? I’m half of one of those.

Don’t feel too sorry for me, though. I do make more money when you include scholarships and whoring my brain for scientific research. And really, I live pretty damn comfortably compared to most people on Earth, so I have absolutely no right to complain.

Still, some extra money wouldn’t hurt. So I’m selling my old Xbox on Ebay (go bid on it if it’s not too late).

I’ve had good experiences selling old crap on Ebay. I managed to make a couple hundred bucks off an mp3 player that’s a few years old (but was still awesome), and made $50.00 off some stupid toy sword Nintendo DS stylus that I got free when I bought something else at Futureshop. But the thing with Ebay is that it seems like there’s a group of semi-retarded, illiterate, and/or non-English-speaking people on there who like to ask questions about items that they never actually bid on.

Most of them are like “omg culd u plzzzzz ship to austria mate? ill pay whatever it takezzz!1!”, then you look at their profile and they’re actually from Australia, and they never put a single bid in. But some questions are even dumber.

For the Xbox, I had someone ask “did you install a bigger hard drive in it, and if so, how big is it?” Yeah, of course, I spent the time to buy a new hard drive, figure out how to open my Xbox and install it there, but OOPS, I forgot to mention that in the description. I didn’t think it would be important to mention that my Xbox is better than most other Xboxes out there when I’m trying to sell it to people.

Here is another question I got (click to embiggen):

Has my newfound identification with the emo lifestyle made me bitter? Or has the world just gotten shittier?





10 responses to “It's a Gas, It's a Hit, It's a Crime”

  1.  Avatar

    If worse comes to worse, we have an extra room you could always come stay in. It would be a nice change from -20 weather. It’s been 70 out here for the past month or so… 🙂 The sun will cheer you up.For some extra money, I’ll hire you to do all my writing. That includes school essays, pointless blog posts, and random dictation on rants. That is… if you can get by our citizenship restrictions, which is virtually non-existent here in southern CA…


  2.  Avatar

    I think the wii cornered the market on magic fairies.I could possibly fit you in my new basement, however the commute’s a bitch and all your roommates act like whiny five year olds.


  3.  Avatar

    Haha thanks dudes. I found a pretty nice apartment, though, and I can probably afford it as long as I don’t eat anything other than Mr Noodle and/or salt. Plus, the commute from California or wherever Jen is to UWO would take a while. Especially without a car. 🙂


  4.  Avatar

    Hahah, if only. Remember, Campbells Ramen Noodle Bowls are like a whole meal! They have broth, and freeze dried vegetables. Mmm.


  5.  Avatar

    For a bit of extra $$, I’ve been hawking my wares on Craigslist.Sadly, no one wants to sleep with me for money. Hmmm…


  6.  Avatar

    All things noodly are a pretty good option. My only advice: Though the Lipton Sidekicks are a delicious and often affordable alternative to Kraft Dinner, don’t do it. In second year, 20 pounds later, I learned that lesson. 20 pounds shouldn’t be that stealthy.


  7.  Avatar

    whoa! This kitty’s got claws!


  8.  Avatar

    I’m (embarrassingly) addicted to World of Warcraft. Also, I still want a Wii and don’t know where to get one. I’m still waiting — 2 weeks now — for some guy to send my $4.69 for a beer stein I bought at Goodwill for $3.50. Pathetic.


  9.  Avatar

    I quickly grew tired of eBay during a phase of “I should sell my car to reduce my debt.” I had one asshole (from Vermont or Montreal, I never could figure it out) telling me that he checked with his Saab dealer and the car was only worth n dollars on a trade so how could I be asking so much?Before I replied “BECAUSE WHEN YOU TRADE A VEHICLE IN, THE DEALER LOWBALLS YOU LIKE CRAZY SO THEY CAN TURN AROUND AND SELL THE FUCKING CAR FOR A PROFIT YOU STUPID FUCKING FUCK” I got ahold of myself, closed all windows, and walked away from my computer.Oh, and I also hate eBay for their retarded billing system.


  10.  Avatar

    Oh man how I hate the billing system. There are like 5 different transactions for each sale, spread out between Ebay and Paypal, and Paypal makes you “upgrade” so that you pay MORE money and get absolutely no benefit in return. Jesus, just charge me a few bucks to sell something and be done with it.


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