Charlie Sheen: The Phronk Connection

Unless you’ve been living under a crack rock, you know about Charlie Sheen’s recent media shitstorm. In a series of interviews (and now on Twitter and uStream), he’s unleashed creative combinations of crazy talk, told unapologetic tales of partying like a dead rock star, and showed off the two “goddess” porn stars that he lives with.

Hey, remember this post from a while ago?



That is none other than Rachel Oberlin, aka Bree Olson, aka the actress that giggled at my dumb joke and was pretty much in love with me. Charlie Sheen done stole my woman.

Aside from that, part of me admires Sheen. There is something to be said for living life how you like it and not giving a shit what everyone else thinks, and that is especially hard when you’re in the public eye. Good for him if the recent attention is just rebelling against an uptight society that can’t handle that he’s enjoying his life and not hurting himself or anyone else.

Ah, but’s the sticky icky point: he’s probably hurting people. Nothing wrong with a little drug use, but there comes a point where it’s doing physical and mental damage. More importantly, there’s evidence that he’s probably not the nicest person, what with women he’s been with tending to end up bruised or shot.

Still, he’s an entertainer, and he’s a hell of a lot more entertaining now than he was on that sanitized antifunny show he was inexplicably paid more than any other actor on TV to be in. I can admire his bold new method of amusing people while despising his rage. Einstein fucked around and ruined his first wife’s life before marrying his cousin, but relativity is still pretty cool.

I doubt Sheen’s contribution will last as long though. There are only so many combinations of the words “winning”, “tiger,” and “warlock” to mash together before it gets old. I think his best move now (and I do think he’s self aware enough to capitalize on all this) is to go Busey-style crazy rather than Haim-style crazy.

Oh, and he better treat Bree with respect, or she’ll be running on back to me.

Comments

14 responses to “Charlie Sheen: The Phronk Connection”

  1. Hey Lady! Avatar

    Hmmm yeah. I think he's far more self-aware then Haim was. And he's already well on his way to Busey greatness, he's crazy yes, but people love him (you ever see that reality show “I'm with Busey”? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27m_With_Busey It's crazy and awesome). Busey has made a career out of guest appearances on television and movies being his crazy self. Sheen could totally do that.

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  2.  Avatar

    Hmmm yeah. I think he's far more self-aware then Haim was. And he's already well on his way to Busey greatness, he's crazy yes, but people love him (you ever see that reality show “I'm with Busey”? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27m_With_Busey It's crazy and awesome). Busey has made a career out of guest appearances on television and movies being his crazy self. Sheen could totally do that.

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  3. Wings Avatar

    I think something snapped in his brain or synapses or whatever. One drug or alcohol binge too many and something went kablooie. So I feel bad that he has all these enablers taking advantage of his condition at this moment. Imagine if it was someone you knew going this haywire. You would be alarmed and try to help. His entourage is doing the opposite.

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  4.  Avatar

    I think something snapped in his brain or synapses or whatever. One drug or alcohol binge too many and something went kablooie. So I feel bad that he has all these enablers taking advantage of his condition at this moment. Imagine if it was someone you knew going this haywire. You would be alarmed and try to help. His entourage is doing the opposite.

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  5. SexyAnkles Avatar

    Will someone please think of the children?

    Seriously, though. A bunch of adults can go off and act like dolts and poison themselves with drugs all they like, but that messes up your kids for sure. In my mind that is what makes him an asshole.

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  6.  Avatar

    Will someone please think of the children?Seriously, though. A bunch of adults can go off and act like dolts and poison themselves with drugs all they like, but that messes up your kids for sure. In my mind that is what makes him an asshole.

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  7. Jennifer Avatar

    Yeah, I'm all for living your life like a crazy foo, but when you have kids, the polite thing to do is to wait until they grow up before you go total batshit. I'm biding my time here.

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  8.  Avatar

    Yeah, I'm all for living your life like a crazy foo, but when you have kids, the polite thing to do is to wait until they grow up before you go total batshit. I'm biding my time here.

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  9. Johnson Avatar

    Good luck with Bree Olsen! When Sheen inevitably dies in the next month or so, she'll be looking for new man. I say ramp up your tweeting. That sounds dirty.

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  10.  Avatar

    Good luck with Bree Olsen! When Sheen inevitably dies in the next month or so, she'll be looking for new man. I say ramp up your tweeting. That sounds dirty.

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  11. Phronk Avatar

    Hey Lady! Totally. I've seen clips from I'm With Busey and really wanna see the rest. He's so awesome on Celebrity Apprentice right now.

    Wings: I dunno…it's also possible that he's always been like this and just hiding it. And if he's really just doing it for the lulz, he doesn't need help any more than the average asshole does.

    SexyAnkles & Jen: Good point about the kids. Freedom to go batshit diminishes once you're responsible for children. I hope they can at least avoid the spotlight and have a normal life, somehow.

    Johnson: True! Chicks dig a dude with big tweets.

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  12.  Avatar

    Hey Lady! Totally. I've seen clips from I'm With Busey and really wanna see the rest. He's so awesome on Celebrity Apprentice right now.Wings: I dunno…it's also possible that he's always been like this and just hiding it. And if he's really just doing it for the lulz, he doesn't need help any more than the average asshole does.SexyAnkles & Jen: Good point about the kids. Freedom to go batshit diminishes once you're responsible for children. I hope they can at least avoid the spotlight and have a normal life, somehow.Johnson: True! Chicks dig a dude with big tweets.

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  13. Forest City Fashionista Avatar

    I have to admit I'm disappointed that you had to add to the already nauseating amount of Sheen media coverage. Could we all stop talking about this trainwreck and move on? Oh, and when the final crash happens, I hope you and Bree live happily ever after.

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  14.  Avatar

    I have to admit I'm disappointed that you had to add to the already nauseating amount of Sheen media coverage. Could we all stop talking about this trainwreck and move on? Oh, and when the final crash happens, I hope you and Bree live happily ever after.

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