Today, in the bathroom, I glanced at the gap under one of the stall doors and noticed that there was a guy in there who had taken his shoes off while he took a dump. I could also hear the faint tinny sound of music playing through headphones. Not only is it kinda gross to take off one’s shoes in a dirty bathroom stall, but is it really necessary to get that comfortable in order to poo?
A lot of people read while they crap, but I find even that strange. How long does it take to shit? Personally, it takes me no more than 5 minutes to pinch off a good sized loaf. Hardly enough time to get through even a short magazine article. When I do find something interesting to read in someone else’s bathroom, I end up sitting there for 20 minutes until my legs are tingly and people start assuming I don’t eat enough fiber.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go make a log entry of a different kind.
Phronk.com 
Comments
8 responses to “Captain’s Log, Stardate -314189.617328223”
After reading this post…… I am having a serious case of man love Mike……:)Dan
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I read (in this case ‘read’ can be used interchangeably in the present or past tense) so often on the toilet for long durations of time that when I started getting partial numbness in my legs two years ago, I suspected it might be connected. It wasn’t.Then the walk-in clinic dude scared me into thinking it was M.S. Then it wasn’t, either. Then it went away. That is my story.
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This will get me through an otherwise dreary Friday.Many Thanks.
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Many ‘welcomes. I love you all.
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I once knew a guy who could NOT take a dump without being completely naked. 🙂 Yes, even if it was in a bar. He would take off all his clothes, neatly fold them and place them in pile on the floor, and then go. I think that’s a lot more strange than: a) reading while on the toilet, b) taking a laptop into the washroom, c) playing your DS on the can, d) taking an important call while taking a dump, and waiting for the conversation to end before flushing…etc etc…LOL.
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You’re speaking my language. Spouse takes off his robe to poo. He needs to be buck naked. I don’t know if I’ve ever been aware of him pooping anywhere but home.
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That is REALLY weird. I think I’d have more trouble pooing naked. It’d be cold. And in a bar? In a guy’s washroom, there’s often not a surface unspoiled by some bodily fluid to put clothes down on (or even sit on, which makes pooping in a bar risky even if not naked).
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If you’re not shitting for at least 10 mins you’re doing something wrong.
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