Buses + Bitch + Bioshock

Buses are sort of like teleporters with a time delay. Think about it; you arrive at a certain location, enter a steel vessel, wait a few minutes, exit the vessel, and you’re at a completely different location from where you entered. I’m telling you, kids, the future is now.

I only wrote this post so that I could say condescending things like “think about it” and “I’m telling you”, because those are pretty hilarious things to say. Think about it.

Oh and in a follow up to that last post about words I hate…I forgot to mention how much I despise Giada De Laurentiis on the Food Network. Not only does her name have one too many “i”s in it, but she insists on saying any word that is remotely Italian with an Italian accent. “Spaghetti” is a common enough word in the English language that there’s really no need to switch to a completely different voice every time she says it. I’m telling you, if you went to Italy and heard them switch from Italian to English every time they said “cheeseburger”, it’d sound like there was something wrong with them.

There is something wrong with Giada De Laurentiis.

I don’t have time to blog because I’m playing Bioshock.

It’s a game for the Xbox 360. There’s been debate amongst geeks as to whether video games can be considered “art” in the same way that media like movies, music, or literature can. Bioshock is one of the first games that settles this debate with a resounding “fuck yes.” It’s a beautiful, cohesive experience that has been crafted with just as much care and creativity as a painting, novel, or movie.

Which is why the paper I have due in a few days will probably be late. Damn you, artsy video game.


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20 responses to “Buses + Bitch + Bioshock”

  1. SharkBoy Avatar

    Dead Robot’s been dying to play since he saw the commercial on tv… problem is they don’t make it for Wii or PS2… But by the looks of what I’ve seen from this game so far, you are 105% correct, it looks like a novel you just happen to be a little part of.I say Montreal (monntreeawl) the English way when I talk about my home town, and I talk about the province of Quebec (Kwebeck). I fringe everytime someone has an English conversation and name those places the French way and roll their Rs and not pronouced their Us when followed by a Q… Why, you’re not more cultured because you do so… Oh my I’m ranting so early in the morning… hehe

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  2.  Avatar

    Dead Robot’s been dying to play since he saw the commercial on tv… problem is they don’t make it for Wii or PS2… But by the looks of what I’ve seen from this game so far, you are 105% correct, it looks like a novel you just happen to be a little part of.I say Montreal (monntreeawl) the English way when I talk about my home town, and I talk about the province of Quebec (Kwebeck). I fringe everytime someone has an English conversation and name those places the French way and roll their Rs and not pronouced their Us when followed by a Q… Why, you’re not more cultured because you do so… Oh my I’m ranting so early in the morning… hehe

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  3. Mitzzee Avatar

    my newest favorite game is playstation II’s transformers. my son loves it too, we’re hooked. he likes to just smash everything i actually try to get to the next levels. lol

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  4.  Avatar

    my newest favorite game is playstation II’s transformers. my son loves it too, we’re hooked. he likes to just smash everything i actually try to get to the next levels. lol

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  5. Dead Robot Avatar

    Yes I’m jealous. I love the look of this game.The first “beautiful” game I ever played was Douglas Adams’ “Starship Titanic”. Crappy game play but great visuals.

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  6.  Avatar

    Yes I’m jealous. I love the look of this game.The first “beautiful” game I ever played was Douglas Adams’ “Starship Titanic”. Crappy game play but great visuals.

    Like

  7. Jen Avatar

    Mark thinks that all modern transit (well, minus walking/biking) is time travel because we are taking energy that had been stored (and is only useful because of how much time and under how much pressure it has been stored) and turning it into travel. He’s a hippie I think.

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  8.  Avatar

    Mark thinks that all modern transit (well, minus walking/biking) is time travel because we are taking energy that had been stored (and is only useful because of how much time and under how much pressure it has been stored) and turning it into travel. He’s a hippie I think.

    Like

  9. Phronk Avatar

    Yeah Bioshock is awesome. I don’t think the PS2 or Wii could handle it; it actually puts good use to the power of the more expensive consoles.Transformers would be fun too. It’s giant robots smashing shit, so that’s pretty hard to NOT be fun.That’s deep, Jen. So taking a bus would be like teleporting and time travel at the same time. Whoa man…trippy.

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  10.  Avatar

    Yeah Bioshock is awesome. I don’t think the PS2 or Wii could handle it; it actually puts good use to the power of the more expensive consoles.Transformers would be fun too. It’s giant robots smashing shit, so that’s pretty hard to NOT be fun.That’s deep, Jen. So taking a bus would be like teleporting and time travel at the same time. Whoa man…trippy.

    Like

  11. Erica AP Avatar

    Wow – she does have a lot of i’s in her name. Is she the one with the reallllly big head?

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  12.  Avatar

    Wow – she does have a lot of i’s in her name. Is she the one with the reallllly big head?

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  13. Phronk Avatar

    Yes!!! V and I call her “bobble-head”.

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  14.  Avatar

    Yes!!! V and I call her “bobble-head”.

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  15. madamerouge Avatar

    but you’d still like to see her naked, right?

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  16.  Avatar

    but you’d still like to see her naked, right?

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  17. Phronk Avatar

    What an offensive stereotype of straight men! Yet another example of our kind being oppressed by society.(…yes)

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  18.  Avatar

    What an offensive stereotype of straight men! Yet another example of our kind being oppressed by society.(…yes)

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  19. Butchie the Minx Avatar

    Her fucking nose is off the scale, too. I’d still bang her, though. I hate Rachel Ray, too. I’d still totally bang her, though.

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  20.  Avatar

    Her fucking nose is off the scale, too. I’d still bang her, though. I hate Rachel Ray, too. I’d still totally bang her, though.

    Like

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